A Tribute

[Seanook]

This story was previously submitted as an entry to the monthly contest. Re-submitting in honor of Ryan Mitchell Bridgman. Feb 15th, 1982- May 19th, 2013.

Sometimes life just isn't fair. Once and a while, amidst all the garbage and strife, there are moments of beauty and clarity that seem to make it all worthwhile or at least bearable.

My Cousin Ryan was born without much of a chance. Almost right from the get go, the Doctors said there was no hope. You see, Ryan was born with Degenerative Liver Disease. At the time of his birth, no-one had ever survived this disease for more than 12 years. Probably, less than that. Every year he survived was a miracle.

By the time he was around 9 or 10, Experimental Medicine and Surgery had made huge leaps and bounds, although they were still just that.....experimental. Ryan had already beaten the odds. Doctors still didn't hold out much hope. He would need a new Liver if he ever wanted to make it to his teenage years. Our family was desperate. My Aunt and Uncle never ever gave up hope. They started a Charity in his name and talked to specialists from all over the world.

Finally the day came when enough advancements had been made in modern medicine that less than a handful of doctors in the world were confident that they could perform a transplant that might work.......Might work.

Ryan was given a beeper in case a donor became available. He received constant testing and treatment. It never ended. One day the Doctors came back with some test results that were almost too much to fathom. Ryan had Cancer. There was a tumor on his liver. It grew rapidly. Eventually it was the size of a softball.

Through all of this, Ryan became kind of a spokesperson for children like himself. He was a success story. In the hospital he was confronted every day of the grim reality that most of the other kids with this ailment were dying. Many of his best friends died right in front of him.

One day, the beeper started buzzing!. He was rushed to the Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto. There indeed was a Donor Liver and they had to decide fast whether or not to proceed. My Aunt, Uncle and Ryan himself decided that now was the time and that they were going to proceed. Our entire family gathered at his Bedside. Although he was very sick, he was determined and he showed it. When he went in, I think we all held our breath for what seemed like the entire operation which was extremely lengthy. I remember that the Doctors had given him such a low percentage survival rate that it was almost like saying goodbye.

Well he pulled through. A genuine Miracle or the marvels of Modern Medicine. Call it what you want but he pulled through, until.... he had a stroke!

Thankfully, although he had just had a Liver Transplant, Cancer, a Stroke and was hooked up to more machines and tubes than had ever been seen before, he survived. He got stronger, healthier, and mouthier every day. After quite a while in the ICU and even longer in the children’s ward, he was sent home.

Finally at the age of thirteen, he learned to ride a bike, play Baseball and accompany us on his favorite of all......fishing trips!

Sadly, Ryan has many scars, inside and out. As an adult he has developed Acute Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Survivors guilt and some newly diagnosed after affects from the Brain Damage occurring from his Stroke. Picture a war veteran, who was badly injured in battle and lost almost all his friends. Then replace that man and his friends with children. Ryan has a zest for life and a sense of childish but infectious humor that is almost unrivaled by any man I have ever known or known of, but he is haunted by ghosts and a sadness that I think 99% of the world’s population would find unbearable. In order to deal with alot of his pain, he self medicates with Drugs and Alcohol. It is a demon he fights with on a constant basis.

One place he is seemingly unaffected by all this is when we are fishing. We fish together weekly. On a recent trip to the Niagara Whirlpool, (his first) I watched his face as we came out from the trees into the clearing at the bottom of the wooden steps. It was a moving experience. Seeing him clamber over the rocks onto an exposed Limestone boulder and begin to cast while looking over at me with a twinkle in his eye that we both know means "This is the S#*T"! It gives me an immense feeling of joy.....and some sadness. I wish I could take the pain away. I wish we could stay and fish forever. Sometimes I daydream about winning the Lotto or becoming successful and buying that fishing lodge waaaay up North and making him my permanent fishing guide. I would glady take stump and boulder watch on the front of the boat for that. For now though, day trips on the Grand River or Lake Erie will do........I just wish we could do it every day

Cheeky Bugger pinched my arse just as this photo was taken.

R.I.P. Cuz. Miss you everyday.

[DaveC]

Awesome story Sean. Makes you realize why we should be appreciative to what we have. Your time spent with him will always be remembered. Great story bud...and my condolances to you and your family.

[Seanook]

Thank you Dave. The man was a hero. Tons of good memories. Most of them inappropriate for a family forum but good ones all the same.

[rickyy33]

a good second read, thanks for sharing. Sorry about your loss

[ogliq2]

Awesome story Sean. Makes you realize why we should be appreciative to what we have. Your time spent with him will always be remembered. Great story bud...and my condolances to you and your family.

I tried, but I couldn't say it any better.

X2 from PFG ...